By Kat Leonard
I don’t really have a lot of times when I actually NEED to open up a can of Whoopass, but that doesn’t mean I won’t when the time calls for it. Oh yes. I am willing and able to open up that can. Usually when I do open it I’m trying to pwn n00bs on Xbox Live rather than actually getting into the ring like the MMA’s Ryan Bader, the most-known endorser of this drink.
Supposedly this stuff isn’t just for energy, but for helping in muscle recovery after a long workout session. There are actually a few drinks and shots that align themselves with being for physical exertion rather than a gamer or someone at work needing that boost to get rid of the sleepies after lunch. Honestly, I think I fall more into the gamer category more than anything else.
Heck, I might as well admit it. I one hundred percent fall into the ‘gamer’ portion of the energy drink consumers. I am not an athlete. Never will be. I was for a short stint but we won’t talk about that. You don’t want to hear about my personal history, you want a kickass review for Whoopass Energy Drink!
Let’s get it out of the way: I don’t drink these in preparation for strenuous activity. No. For me, I don’t need a lot of energy. Just enough for me to get that “DING!” I don’t lose sodium in my sweat because I don’t sweat during my play sessions. So most of what the drink is made for is lost on me. It’s the caffeine and such I’m looking for, and they have got it in there. Last night I was able to stay up to watch the Swedish foreign film The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo. Heard of it? You should at least read the book. But I digress… I was able to get through the entire thing and be alert enough to follow the plot. It was kind of late and I was tired from a bad night of trying to get food… Again, I digress.
I have had Whoopass before writing this review. It is a good drink. I would buy it from the stores just like I buy my AMP and Monster. Opening the can as the label demands you get a nice fruity type smell as most energy drinks have. I don’t smell anything medicinal, nor do I taste it. What I do taste is something akin to dragonfruit and vanilla. The last couple of cans I’ve had, the drink has been a little sour, and that was the case with last night’s can. It made me pucker a little, but after a few sips it began to go down smooth. I suspect my taste buds were still in shock from the sourness. However, there are a lot of drinks that stay sour the entire time you drink it, so this is not bad at all.
I have a confession… I’ve only had actual Jones Sodas a couple times in my life. They are always so expensive when I go to buy a 6-pack. The few times I’ve tried them it’s been because of a friend who has them. It’s been so long I don’t even remember what one tastes like. One thing I do know for certain is that Whoopass is definitely heavier-hitting than the innocent sodas that the Jones Company sells. And without the jitters of some other drinks.
Contrary to popular belief, you do not need to be a part of the MMA to knock back a can of Whoopass. Or open one, I suppose. I am not. I never will be. It has a good kick that won’t make it feel like you have been knocked out by an MMA champ afterward (in other words, no crash). Each can has a lot of vitamins, minerals, and free radical-neutralizing compounds. Yum. But you don’t taste any of them. Just that interesting type of dragonfruit and vanilla flavor.
As with any drink, your mileage may vary with whether you like the taste, like the smell, like the kick, etc. Also, if you’re sensitive to caffeine you… well what are you doing here? This site isn’t for you. Go on. Shoo! Anyway… yes. I definitely suggest you at least pick up a can of Whoopass at your local grocery store or gas station. Then later you can get a 4-pack or whatever you desire if you find you like it.
Score: 8.0/10 (Great)
This review by: Kat Leonard